Not Every Thought You Think Is the Truth

Sometimes we ruminate on thoughts that simply aren’t true, aren’t productive and aren’t kind. We would never speak to a friend this way, so why do we say it to ourselves?

And yet, for many of us, this becomes the loop we repeat. Especially when we are about to do something new. A new challenge, unfamiliar territory, a shift in identity.

But these self-imposed limitations are often just ways of avoiding change. Our brains are wired to resist it because they want to keep us safe from perceived threats. The short version is this: the brain prefers the familiar. When we step into the unknown, those limiting thoughts often appear as a protection mechanism. Protecting us from perceived social, physical or emotional discomfort.

The irony is that these beliefs, designed to keep us safe, usually do the opposite. They block growth, create self-sabotage, lead to missed opportunities and can affect our mental wellbeing.

How to Stop the Negative Voice in Your Head

It is not easy to silence the inner critic, but awareness is the first step. The more you notice it, the quicker you can call it out and put it in its place.

Next time you move outside your comfort zone, pause and notice what comes up.

Many thoughts are automatic because we have repeated them for years:

• I couldn’t possibly do that.
• It’s too late.
• I’m too old.

Now challenge the thought.

• Is that really true?
• Hand on heart, can you honestly say it is a fact?
• If it feels true, whose truth is it? Yours or someone else’s?
• Is this a fact or a perception?

Most fears come from perceived threats, not factual ones.

Sometimes the fear isn’t even ours. It can come from someone else’s experience or beliefs. This is why the company you keep matters. Other people’s limitations can rub off on you.

In a Nutshell

• Observe the belief.
• Call it out.
• Is it a fact or a perceived belief? For example, “I’m too old” is usually a perception unless there is a genuine age requirement, like playing a character of a certain age.
• Is it your belief or someone else’s?

Once you know whether it is truth or perception, then go a little deeper.

If the Belief Is Based on Truth

Ask yourself:

• What can I do about it?
• What can I take action on right now?
• What can I learn from it?
• What can I do differently next time?
• What is the actual outcome I am trying to achieve?

You cannot always change the mind with the mind, but you can change it with positive action.

If the Belief Is Not Factually True

Then it is a thought. Nothing more.

Understanding what that thought triggers is important.

Ask yourself:

• Who would I be without this stressful thought?
• How would I act, speak or show up?

Then take action. If your goal is to get a job or volunteer role, ask yourself what an excited and determined job seeker or volunteer seeker would be doing today. How would they show up?

Then reframe the belief into something helpful.

“I’m too old to get a job” becomes “I have years of experience to offer and a strong work ethic because I want to be here, not because I have to be.”

These thoughts do not disappear overnight. Many of us have lived with them for years. But learning to notice them is how you build the bridge between where you are now and where you want to be, and often the happiness that sits on the other side.

If you can catch the negative thought, call it out, take it for what it is and turn it into something kinder, something you would say to a friend… then you are already on your way.

This takes practice, but it gets easier the more you do it.

If You Need Further Help

If you want support with breaking these limiting thoughts and learning how to respond to that negative voice in a healthier way, I offer a free 30-minute Discovery Call. We’ll talk about the beliefs that keep showing up for you, the changes you want to make and what would help you move forward with more self-belief and steadiness. It’s a relaxed, no-pressure chat and a chance to focus on you, your thinking and the direction you want to take from here.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

When was the last time a limiting thought tried to hold you back? What did it say and how did you challenge it? Share it below. Sometimes simply naming the thought takes away its power. Now you’ve named and shamed, what is your reframe? And what’s one small action you can take this week to reinforce that new belief? Share in the comments below.